Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them.
Titus 3:10
I really don’t care what political party you belong to. I could care less about your being conservative or liberal. Whether you live in a red or blue state. Let’s agree that we’re all pretty much the same. We want the same things, peace in our time. Health and prosperity for our kids.
Now, the real question comes as to what we’re willing to do to achieve these things. Are we willing to work hard for the causes that are important to us? Are we willing to stand up for the right? To defend the poor and helpless? To give of our time and money to help those who can’t defend themselves.
I’d like to think that we’d all be willing to do the right things. To speak the truth in love[1]. That we’d learn to do good; seek justice, correct oppression; bring justice to the fatherless, and plead the widow's cause[2].
But, as we’re so painfully aware of, not everyone’s interested in helping people. There are those who only want to help themselves, and they’re ready to do anything and everything to get what they want.
It doesn’t matter what they say, or even if it’s the truth. All that matters is that they get their way. It doesn’t matter what they do. Who they step over. Who they step on. All they’re thinking about is getting their own way. Their favorite song is Fleetwood Mac’s “Have your own way[3].”
This is the kind of person that Paul’s telling Titus about. When Paul warns about a divisive person, he’s describing some one who’s only out for themselves. They always, always, always choose for Number One. Them. They worship at the alter of the unholy trinity. Me. Myself. I.
Divisive people do just that. They flat-out refuse to accept the truth as written in the Bible and always choose for themselves. They push their own ideas ahead of everyone and anyone else.
And when they always choose for themselves, they divide. They can’t help it. Just think about it for a minute. If two people always choose for themselves, then they never choose for anyone else. They never consider the other person. There’s no agreement. There’s no compromise. They divide.
Paul instructs Titus to take the time to warn them. To instruct them in the things of God. To spend time sharing God’s lovingkindness as shown to us all through the death and resurrection of Jesus. Titus is to warn them once. And then to warn them again. And then it’s time to stop warning and to move on.
I don’t know about you, but I find this hard to swallow. After all, I might have messed up and really didn’t express myself properly. Or clearly. I could have used a better story. A better example. I could have been more patient. More loving. More caring.
We should work hard at being clearly understood whenever we speak or write. This is especially true when it comes to the truths of who God is and Jesus’ one-time payment for all our sin. But God’s not limited by how great a public speaker we are. He’s never held back because of our weaknesses.
Exhibit A of this truth is the Apostle Paul himself. We think of him as this giant of a man. A gifted speaker. Someone who rolled into town, snapped his fingers, and crowded churches instantly appeared. But nothing could be further from the truth.
Take his speaking ability. When people heard him preach, their reaction wasn’t wow. It was more of a so what. Some said that he was unimpressive as a speaker and that his words amounted to nothing[4].
And when it came to his physical appearance, he was nothing to write home about. One letter describes him as being small and with bushy eyebrows that met over his nose. He was bald and his eyes looked hollow. He had bowed legs and a large, crooked nose[5]. Doesn’t sound like anyone you want dating your daughter. Does it?
You see, God uses flawed and broken people just like you and me. We may not have it all together, but that’s where God steps in. He’s the one who puts our lives back together again. He uses our weakness to show just how powerful he is. God’s power is made perfect in our weakness[6]
God’s warning is crystal clear. He delights in weakness and humility. So, the question is, are we divisive people? Are we the kind or person that only wants our way? Always wants our own way. Or are we willing to bow before God in humble confession of our weakness and sins? This is the start of truly living the life that God made us for.
Noodling Questions
When you see a divisive person, how do you react? Explain.
Do you want to warn and instruct divisive people? Why?
On a scale of 1-to-10, how divisive of a person are you? Explain.
[1] Ephesians 4:15
[2] Isaiah 1:17
[4] 2 Corinthians 10:10
[5] The Acts of Paul and Thecla
[6] 2 Corinthians 12:9
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